Winner:
“I'm terribly sorry but my mother told me I wouldn't need a ticket.” - submitted by Alan Clothier.

Some of the best runners up were:

“I don't care if you're the Duke of Windsor, you still can't bring your dog on this train.”
- Seamus Barnicle

“Everywhere one goes - the smell of fresh paint.”
- D. M. Wynne-Hughes

“HRH appears less than impressed with Winchcombe stations new waxwork station staff.”
- anonymous

“I don't care who you are, you're not taking that cup & saucer onto the platform.”
- Alisdair McNicol

“So you're running in the 4.15 then ma'am?”
- Bert

“The tea is quite acceptable but I came to see 'King George'.”
- Chris Sparks